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 Mother with sole custody grants poa to legal strangers? |
| Child Custody & Visitation |
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Tennessee
My husband's daughter is 14. Her mother has sole legal custody. In July of 2007,my husband got a phone call from his daughter's mother to come and pick up his daughter to live with him. He did. She stayed in our home until March 2008, she traveled to TX for Spring Break and didn't come back. Since then, his daughter has been sexually assaulted and a trial came of it. Her mother (at the end of March 2009), signed some sort of POA (which my husband didn't know anything about and still hasn't seen) to legal strangers. The couple his daughter has been living with since the end of March is the mother's x-boyfriend's 1/2 brother and his wife. Her mother is still living somewhere in TX. My husband sent her child support (by Western Union) because she said she doesn't have an address (she is supposedly moving to Austin,TX from Whitehouse/Tyler, TX). The mother told my husband she couldn't "handle" their daughter. He told her he wanted his daughter with him instead of with her x-boyfriend's family. She agreed (verbally). She said she would sign another POA (she says the caregiver's POA expired on July 31) so that he could pick up his daughter and bring her to live with him. The phone call got interrupted, she said she'd call right back, and that has been about 4 days ago. My husband wants to know, can he just go and get his daughter? Also, his daughter told him that she doesn't want to live with him or her mom and is trying to get "emancipated" from them? She then said that the couple she is staying with is going to help her? My husband does not agree with the couple's religious beliefs (ex. speaking in tongues, laying on of hands). The couple spends a lot of time at this church. It's kinda creepy. What should his first step be in getting his daughter out of that home? Does he have a leg to stand on seeing as he doesn't have custody, but is the child's father! Help!
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| Sex during divorce |
| Divorce, Separation & Annulment |
Three years ago, my husband legally separated from me in SC. During the year of separation, we had sex numerous times, even the night before the final divorce hearing. Because I mentioned this to the judge, he did not grant my husband a divorce. We eventually got back together and moved to TN. He filed for divorce due to irreconcilable differences and I was served in June. After I was served, he told me I can not use the excuse of us being intimate with this divorce because it won't matter and we continued having sex. He is divorcing me because I'm bipolar although he said he still loved me.
My question is why is it any different between before and now. I mean, why did the judge throw out the divorce three years ago, but this time, it's ok?
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| Father asking child to lie |
| Child Custody & Visitation |
My son is 16 and we live in Tennessee, his father and I have been divorced for 14 years and I am extremely frustrated. I’m not sure if we need counseling at this point or if something can be done legally. I have always been the custodial parent and he has bi-weekly visitation.
For the past few months my son and I have been having problems. Let me give you a little background on my son before I go into detail. Up until the past few months he has been a model child. I have never had any problems. He was always polite and loving. He is ranked number one in his class, just a great kid all around.
Like most teenagers he wants to do what he wants to do. Being the custodial parent I am the one who has to make the rules and enforce them so he’s not always pleased with me. I have hoped this was just a case of him lashing out at the stricter parent however recently I have found out differently.
When his father and I separated he refused to give me my sons social security card. Up until now that hasn’t been a big problem as all I have needed is the number. (I traded the right to claim him on taxes for Easter) My son being 16 and now holding a job needed the card. When asked for the card he told me he didn’t have the original only a copy.
My son went to his grandmothers to get the copy. They copied the card in front of him and told him not to tell me that he had the original. My sons employer called me and told me a copy would not suffice that they needed the original before they could pay him. So I called his step mother to ask her to look one more time as Tye is having his check held due to the situation. She then fumbles around thinking Tye had told me and lets the cat out of the bag.
When I went to his fathers home to get the card they were waiting on me, card in hand. When I asked him why he would do something like that he called our son a liar…my son was there. His wife, which by the way is a lawyer, had apparently not told him she had told me. When he found out he just said “You lose everything”.
On top of having him lie to me there are many other instances of him over the past few months trying to come between me and my son. I had caught my son speeding and his stepfather and I have tried to talk to him and even grounded him from the car. I thought maybe his father and I could talk some since into him so I told him what happened. He then turns looks at our son and says “55 in a 35 now I know you can go faster than that” !
When my son gets upset at me over something I have done he texts his father. His father in return goes on about how I’m too strict and how he wouldn’t do something like that. I know this because my son and I switched cells and the texts were on the phone.
I am just at a point where I don’t know what to do, any and all advice will be greatly appreciated.
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| divorce law tennessee |
| Divorce, Separation & Annulment |
| legal immigrant from got married to US citizen in India and again in TN. we met through marriage bureau and his profile said he did not have medical problems . He revealed he suffers from spina bifida after the wedding. I comforted him but he refused to consummate the marriage . He said he dated before wedding but when I revealed i loved somebody too before wedding he became suspicious and blames the failure of our marriage on my past eventhough I am still a virgin. i left my doctoral program because of him . he has income over 120k per year and house. he offered me compensation. considering my parents spent a lot on my wedding i am not sure how much I am entitled to legally. My family is saying the divorce he can get in USA will not be valid and I can fight for more compensation in my home country. we were engaged for 3 months and stayed together after marraige for 6 months and i am at his mothers place for past two months and he is insisting I sign the divorce papers and leave please advise
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| legal seperation info please |
| Divorce, Separation & Annulment |
| first of all, thanks for reading this. i live in Tn and my wife and i have filed for legal separation.They told us in 60 days she would have to call the courts and find out when her court date is. (she filed for the separation) We are 30 days into it. At the time i did want the divorce or separation. So it was non contestent. Now that some time has gone by i want to work it out. We have only been married for 3 months but been together for 4 years. Someone told me if you married for a short amount of time sometimes they make you go to counseling before they will allow you to get a divorce. Is this true? and if its not, is there a way i can request for this to happen? I believe if we were to do counseling it would save our relationship. Thanks again for reading this and helping me out.
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| Need Advice: Whole situation... |
| Divorce, Separation & Annulment |
Hello, I'm a 28 year old man who has been married just over 5 years. My wife is 29 years old. We have a 3 year old daughter together and she has an 11 year old son.
We have had an extremely rocky marriage, almost the entire time. There have been many times divorce has been on the table, and I can't count the number of times I've been told to get out or had the wedding band thrown at me. I'm not perfect, I can be lazy and consumed by other things like sports and gaming. However, I have never broken our wedding vows and really am a homebody, I'm always here. In spite of that, she's always had severe paranoia I was cheating.
Anyway, she has asserted once again that she wants a divorce, and I'm not stopping her or even attempting it, but I need an objective view on where I stand here.
First and foremost, we have always kept our money separate. We tried when we first stared living together to share a bank account and money would just disappear. So, she has her bills and I have mine, it's always been that way. Since I've met her, she's always worked, but can't hold a job. She's been fired from 2 and left another just before being fired. Nevertheless, she's always worked.
Recently, she got her job back at the daycare she worked at and was fired from, only to quit two weeks later b/c she felt she made more money keeping two kids at the home. It should be noted she gets paid by a check, but shows the government no income and she's not licensed for this to my knowledge.
I caught her having an affair last November. I didn't know the man, but she'd gotten into a phase where she'd just take off and stay gone overnight, so I knew something was up. I stayed, b/c upon self reflection, I realized I could have been a better husband, and felt my child deserved another chance. I know that now that I've done that, the affair will carry very little legal weight.
So here's what I have. Recently, I have discovered what I've suspected for some time, she is addicted to pain pills. For a long time, she got them via her OBGYN for pain for her endometreosis, but she had a hysterectomy early this year and that is gone. But she's never gotten off them. I broke my foot in January and found she'd taken 12 out of my bottle of Vicodin in 2 days, though she denied it.
A month ago, I discovered through the keylogger on my PC, that she'd ordered pills from a Canadian Pharmacy citing a doctor she'd never seen. I went to her about it, she said someone broke into the house at 1 PM, while only she and the two children were here, and ordered those under her name to be shipped here... According the keylogger, which I checked for accuracy, 5 minutes after ordering the pills, she paid the water bill. She will go to her grave swearing she didn't order them, but miraculously, they were cancelled the following day.
She went to the doctor on July 15th claiming a toothache I think, and he gave her Vicodin, 40 of them. I checked her bottle on Tuesday the 21st and they were GONE. So, I looked on her phone and low and behold, she was texting several people asking if they had any pain pills or knew someone that would trade pain pills for klonipins she gets from her psych. The following day, I discovered she was able to obtain Darvacets by asking the mother of a little boy she keeps to help her, so she called her in something. My wife has never seen that doctor.
I still have pills left from my broken foot, and suspected she'd gotten in my car that night, so I checked that bottle. Yes, I have to hide it b/c I suspected her taking them in the past. There were 5 missing. So that night, I rigged my car so I'd know for absolute certainty if she got in it and she did, though the pills had been moved. It was when I questioned her about getting in my car that she told me of her new wishes to divorce.
Two weeks ago, I suspect she went to the state and got WIC. The thing is, she doesn't qualify for WIC living here b/c our household income is too high. Not by much, but it's too high. I suspect she got that WIC by telling them we were separated, which we aren't.
Here's where I need help. I am concerned for my daughter's safety. My wife has terrible mood swings, depression and anxiety from the addiction to the pain pills, but she won't admit it, so she won't get help. I suspect and almost know for a fact that she has illegally obtained these pills, along with the WIC from the state, as well as making income she isn't paying taxes on.
Do I have a case to take my daughter? I plan on seeing a lawyer this week, I saw one a few months ago before I knew about and could prove the addiction, and he said I wouldn't be able to get my daughter and I'd have to pay her spousal support since she doesn't "technically" have a job.
If I can prove the addiction and illegal activity, is that grounds for me gaining custody? If she willfully quit her job to "work at home", will she have a claim to spousal support if I don't get my child?
A couple of facts that factor in. I make $34,000 before taxes and pay for all the health insurance. We rent. Our bills our basically separate, but we have two older cars we owe on. One is mine that I drive and pay for, and the other is the Jeep she drives which I pay for. When we split up, I foresee myself being able to rent a small place in a decent area on a budget, and she is planning on moving into her mom's downstairs, which has no "rooms", and is just one area, with the two kids.
I appreciate anyone who took the time to read this and offer advice. I'm in a very tough spot with this and I desperately need help.
If I missed something, please bring it up, I'll address it. Thanks again.
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| Now What |
| Child Custody & Visitation |
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? AR
I just picked up son, his dad sent him via a relative to TN and I drove to pick him up there. Dad did not sign and send back the new parenting plan that we had discussed. He is not willing to sign it now. He wants us to just "work it out" and he does not want me filing for child support and wants me to drop his current support order of 18.00 per month.
So I have all three children, here in AR, original orders are out of TN, none of the parties reside in TN any longer and have not since May of 2008. Current orders were signed in TN Feb 2009. Dad had relocated the children from TN to IL without proper notice or approval and I filed for modification. So that stopped the clock on IL residency for the children while in IL. It has not been 6 months since the last orders by TN.
My current orders give me residential on the two that came here in Feb.09 and dad has residential of son, who is now here as well. My concern is dad can just come get son at will if he gets mad at me.
How do I secure custody of son that I just picked up?
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| grandparent nightmare! |
| Grandparent’s Rights |
Does anyone have any advice for this situation. My eleven year old son's father and I never married. He has had a very limited role in my Son's life. I have been married to my husband for almost five years and we have a three year old daughter together.
I have allowed my son's father's parents liberal visitation with my son over the years. 90% of the time I allow them to have him when they ask. On the occassions I do not let him go, they will sulk and accuse me of various things then invoke the "grandparent's rights" threat. My son has behavior issues (nothing really major, but I have a family history of bipolar disorder and addiction, so I want him to deal with these issues before he has worse problems), and they will not work with me to help with this. they have even criticized me for sending him to a "quack" (their description of his consuleor). My son is a very schedule/routine oriented person. He thrives on structure....they will not even attempt to do simple things to help keep him on track.
His father has little contact with my son. He pays child support (most of the time). He has switched jobs over the past two years and the child support payments would become sporadic during his job transitions. This has thrown my finances off. Don't get me wrong, i am an independant woman, and capable of supporting myself. I could support myself and my children on my own (without help from my husband or son's father), if need be, although it would be tough. Things would be tight, but I would not be in dior straights without childsupport. It definately helps, though. After talking to his father and trying to explain that I had bills to and that we were doing some work to the house at the time, that i needed to know when there was going to be a hiccup in childsupport. I can budget my money appropriately, but it is difficult when I am expecting something and it does not come in. I politely asked him if he could warn me when it was going to be late, or at least let me know when he sent his payment to the state. This was so that i would not spend extra money during a month when support was not going to be there....not to sick the child support people on him. I even suggessted that he apply for a modification if he could not afford the current payment. I waited a year and filed a modification for him, now he refuses to go to court. I am actually trying to help him LOWER what he pays in support.
He now lives in FL, and used the excuse that he was not served papers in time to go to court. Ironically, he emailled me the next day saying that he was in TN at his parents house and wanted to see our son that weekend. I told him no, because we have already made plans, and that he should give more advanced notice. He then shouts off in an email that he DEMANDS that I allow him to see his son and that I constantly deny he and his parents visitation. (For the record, son's father has only asked to see son about 4 or 5 times total....I only turned him down because of the lack of notice) He threatens to "take legal action" and lots of other mess. I invited him to hire a lawyer, petition the court for set, regular visitation....after all he will have to abide by it and visit his son.
Another complication I have is my crazy mother. She was diagnosed with multible mental issues years ago. Since I married my husband she has done multiple things to undermine my authority with my son. She has even taken actions that put our daughter at risk. She had a habit of showing up at my house, letting herself in (she no longer has a key), and even attempting to take my son with her on occassion. What would usually happen is she would barge into my home, lead my son to his room (which is out of earshot) and tell him untrue things about me. On multiple occasions, the baby monitor would be on in my daughter's roon accross the hall, so I would turn on the receiver just to see what she was saying. She would call me horrible things, tell my son that he should not have to pick up his own room or do chores, that was considered abuse, etc. I finally got tired of her doing this and threw her out of my house two years ago and have cut off contact with her. It does not end there. She is very muniputalive. Since I have not willingly given my son over to her, she has started a smear campaign. She tells various people in our small town things that are not true about me. She has told people that my husband will not allow me to have contact with my family because he made us join a cult**************my husband is an atheist, and last time I checked they do not form cults! She has told people that my daughter is retarded because I took drugs while pregnant with her...neither is true. My daughter knew her ABC's before she could walk and can count past twenty at 3, not to mention, she can talk your ears off! I have never used/abused any illegal substance. The only prescription drug I took when I was pregnant was Phenegram for nausea. You get the point. She is now communicating with my son's other grandparents. My son has read some of the emails they have exchanged and has tried to tell his nana that my mother is lying. I am becoming paranoid, because I do not know what they are planning and why they (especially my own mother) feel the need to do these things....my son is caught in the middle. My son has had a good relationship with my stepfather, unfortuanately, he and my mother are a package deal and I will not risk either of my children's safety.
Here is my dilemia...this situation is driving me nuts! I Try to be fair with my son's father and his parent's for visitation, although they have no regard for my wishes and my son's emotional needs. Often we are faced with canceling our plans at the last moment so they can get my son, and he will not miss out on what we were going to do. If we continue with our plans when he is away, he feels left out and jealous of his sister, sometimes resentful. He always comes back home with an attitude and sometimes behavior problems at school after a visit. What can I do? I have no issue with the father and his parents having visitation, I have a problem with the last minute insistance that I comply with their demands and their lack of respect for my family. I do not want my delusional mother in my or my children's life. How can I legally prevent her from doing that? Is there something preemptive I can do? We are not wealthy by any means....We pay our bills and have a little bit of extra money, but not enough to sustain a lenghthy court battle. If my son's father would just man-up and talk to me instead of using his mother, I feel like a lot of issues would be resolved. Anytime I mention that idea, His mother puts out the idea that I just want to get back together with him, which could not be further from the truth! Is there a way that I can get our parents to butt out and let us resolve the issues ourselves? Please, any advice, this is driving me nuts!
Raspberrykin
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| role of none parent in custody battle? |
| Child Custody & Visitation |
I am the finance.
A few years ago finance had custody of his daughter. Due to several reasons he felt he was not providing for her as well as he should and allowed the grandmother, (mom’s mother) take custody. The mom is still involved in the kids life but has never should interest in custody.
Now that he has made the correct changes to his life to be able to care for his daughter he is seeking custody back. He has brought this up to the grandmother and she was open to giving custody back with out having to have a custody battle, now for no apparent reason she has mentioned wanting to pull some of his visitation as lately he has been getting his daughter more than the original visitation agreement.
I have the personality that I normally take control and try to fix everything, but I have been trying to hold back on this issue. I have told him that what ever he wanted to do I would be behind him but feel I should be doing something more to help him get custody. We will be married in October and he has mentioned that he may wait until after we are married to file for custody because he thinks it would be easier after we were married.
How involved should I be in the custody battle?
What if anything can I do to help him?
Will it make any difference in him waiting to file for custody until after we are married?
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| The ex moved my kids out of state |
| Child Custody & Visitation |
| My ex moved my kids out of state without consulting with me. She won't give me the address or even tell me where they are. I am paying almost $1000 per month in child support and feel that I deserve to know where my kids are. Is she within her legal rights keeping this information from me?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
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| Ex trying to take child out of state |
| Child Custody & Visitation |
I, and my ex, are in Georgia. He has full physical custody of my daughter, while we have joint legal custody. I get visitation every 2 weeks.
My ex has lost his job; he just called me and told me that he plans on taking our daughter to Tennessee with him, so he can be closer to his new internet GF.
To explain why I lost custody, as succinctly as I can:
My ex abused me and my daughter. I got the worst of it, thank God. It was mostly verbal, emotional and sexual (on my part); I never got hospitalized. He did once leave bruising on DD as a baby, and my mother got a pic of it.
I ended up in a very bad place after 4 years of this. I realized I was having thoughts of suicide, and I took action on it. After spending 6 weeks in a residential treatment program, I was able to tell the ex that I wanted a divorce.
I am fine now. I've since remarried, and everything is just fine.
Basically, everything that could go wrong did go wrong. Ex's first attorney ended up being a good friend of the judge; judge threw out TPO and tossed out all my allegations of abuse as "I'm pretty sure the plaintiff was making it up". When shown the bruising picture, he replied that I could've photoshopped it.
So it ended up going from abused woman trying to flee with her daughter to crazy lady who'd been in a psych hospital against nice, stand-up guy who had a job and insurance. (He hadn't allowed me to work.)
My husband and I have very little money; I'm back in school going for a nursing degree. Ex wants to move my daughter to TN, and I am heartbroken. Can anyone tell me what rights I have in this situation?
Thank you...
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| Prison |
| Child Support |
| TENNESSEE (only U.S. law)? Can I get child support for my daughter if her dad is in prison?
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