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| What is okay to bring up? |
| Child Custody & Visitation |
| I have a 1 yr old and have recently taken away visitation from the dad due to his weed smoking. Yes I did know that he did it when we were together, and yes he did still do it after my daughter was born in July. But i was looking for a place to move out to. I moved out in Jan to my own place and he was seeing her every sun night to Tues night and every other weekend. I do not feel that it is a safe enviroment for her to be in with people coming and going. He also has a 7 yr old the lives with him most of the time. Is it wrong to bring that up or to call Social services? I am willing to give him everyother weekend from 6pm fri to 6pm sun. or do I need to give him more? I would also like for him to show he is in treatment but can I ask thet? along with Drug screens that I know he will not pass but then what is the follow up to that? He states the he will never do it infront of out daughter. But she could always get a hold of some of the weed. I want to protect my daughter and not come off as im attaking him. Please helpWhat is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
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| Going Pro Se.. when to ask attny to withdraw |
| Child Custody & Visitation |
| My attny (who is great!) has finished the response to Xfiles motion to appeal his request for attorney fees which was denied at the trial court. My goal is to go Pro Se after this as Xfiles continues to file motion after motion, pro se after his own attny fired him (25 at last count in 3 years) and his goal is to quote "make me bankrupt". The ruling on the appeal can take several months. I don't want to talk to my attny about this obviously, but my thinking was to wait till the ruling was obtained before asking my attny to withdraw? or is there any reason I should not ask him to withdraw now? I dont want to complicate the appeals process?
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| In need of help |
| Child Custody & Visitation |
| I have a 15 year old son, his father and I were never married I did take him to court for child support when my son was 3. We lived in Colorado where is dad currently is. I have since married and about 5 years ago my husband was offered a job in the DC metro area. I had the original agreement modified with my attorney in Colorado to move out here. Part of the agreement was a reduction of child support paid to me while our son is visiting for 3 weeks during the summer (which I now regret), but as part of the reduction his father was supposed to get him into camps or something. My son just returned home from the visitation and told me that not only did he not go anywhere but he babysat his younger siblings,9 and 3 while his dad and step-mom were at work. Another thing is during these visits he is supposed to allow my son to see and or call anybody in my family that is there grandma, grandpa, aunts, uncles...when I ask my ex if he saw/called anybody his response is always I asked and he didn't want to. To top it off the child support he does send is never on time and gets later and later every month. I had his wages garnished at one time only to have him change jobs every time his wages were touched. My attorney in Colorado is no longer practicing law, where do I go from here? Should I hire somebody in VA or find somebody else in CO? or do I even have a case?
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| Motion to Dismiss w/out prejudice when co-petition was filed and signed? |
| Divorce, Separation & Annulment |
I filed a co-petition for divorce in February, husband acted on it in March. We had a status conference in March or April and set a court date of end of August. I want to stop the proceedings but my lawyer told me that my husband has to agree to stop. Truth or fiction? can I file to dismiss?
I'm sick about this- my children need both parents and we *must* work on our differences. thanks.
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| Even with Court Order, Ex refuses to Pay |
| Alimony & Spousal Support |
I have recently finished off paying support arrearages (alimony no child support) to my ex. The ex had a Notice to Withhold filed with my employer and the money was coming directly from my paycheck. The arrearages have been paid and I filed a motion with the Court, pro se, to have the ex's attorney submit a new Notice to Withhold and to refund the surplus in alimony that was paid to the ex. The judge approved my motion and signed a Court order for the ex to repay me within 3 days.
The ex's attorney filed the new Notice to Withhold as instructed but he claims my ex will not return his phone calls so he has had no contact to discuss the surplus reimbursement. The surplus in now at $2500.
My ex was notified by the Court of the Order but hasn't taken any action. I don't live in Colorado anymore where the divorce was granted and where my ex lives.
My ex doesn't work legally. Only gets paid under the table to avoid having me get alimony adjusted. I still pay $2000/month which is withheld from my paycheck and send to my ex so I can't withhold payment until it balances out and I can't attach wages.
1. What next steps do I need to follow in the legal process to get the surplus paid back to me? What actions can I take that might motivate my ex to pay. Any ideas are welcome. I truly appreciate the help.
Thanks.
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| Childsupport question |
| Child Support |
I have two children. In 1996 when ex and I divorced we agreed upon $350 per month for child support for the two children. This continued until 2006 when she moved the children further away. The judge then reset childsupport down to $300 per month Sept-May and nothing June, July and Aug. This amount was not calculated using any income amounts it's simply what the judge ordered do to the fact she wanted to move because her husband had a better job and he told her she should bear more of the financial responsiblities. (His exact words).
Currently one of the children (age 17) has decided to move in with me. Although mom isn't happy about it she feels there is little she can do so she told her she would not fight her. However she refuses to do anything for her as long as she is with me.
I understand I simply can't stop paying or change the amount of support, but isn't my daughter entitled to her mothers support as well as mine? I'm sending the same amount of support, yet I now have all of the bills for my daughter.
I'm worried that since the orginal amount of support was not determined according to any income guidelines, and given the fact my ex has never kept a job over 3 months there is probably very little I can do. Any suggestions?
Also wondering since CO says nothing about who claims the children on taxes may I claim my daughter now that she lives with me and not her mother.
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| Extracurricular Activities |
| Child Custody & Visitation |
So, since I got some really helpful answers on my last questions, I thought I'd post for advice on an issue I'm anticipating problems with.
History: All through last summer and into this spring (Jan/Feb sometime - it blends together right now) was in & out of court. I moved from 45 miles east of dad to 55 miles west of dad - gave about a year's notice & he took me to court to try to get custody & move the kids to his house instead. Things cited as reasons: moving would be bad for them, lack of extracurricular activities that we get them involved with at my residence. Kids live with me most of the year - he gets every other weekend & 1/2 of the summer along with shared holidays & most of their days off of school (breaks, etc). I am listed as primary caregiver. Also, the CO does not mention extracurriculars at all.
I have, over the length of time since the divorce, repeatedly tried to get them involved but was told (by dad via emails) that they could not be scheduled for any of his placement time. Last fall when I went to put my youngest into an extracurricular, dad again stated that it couldn't be on any of his time - so I arranged for child not to have to attend on dad's weekends. Then dad said that I needed his permission prior to enrolling him and he didn't want child in the sport due to asthma - get permission from dr. & then it will be ok. Got the permission from the doctor - still dad isn't happy & refuses to give permission.
My lawyer at the time said to enroll the child anyway - at the time I understood that to mean that I didn't need his permission. I followed her advice & later also put my eldest into a sport (although dad didn't want him in it & didn't take either of them during his time). I have since found from research here & elsewhere that I probably misunderstood & that I probably do need his permission - except in that particular instance? However, I'd like verification on that.
Current Situation: The kids haven't been involved in anything all summer long because dad doesn't involve them where he lives & based on his prior refusals to take them to anything where I live and the fact that the way the exchanges are placed, they wouldn't ever get to be in a game, I didn't enroll them. Fall is coming again where I would have most of the placement time - so they could participate, but now he is saying "I had better not" put them into anything without his approval, which he won't give unless it isn't at all scheduled for his time - which is impractical. I am really sick of the whole drama thing & am torn between wanting my kids to be involved in their activities & not wanting to continue the fight-fest. I also really don't want to just enroll them anyway & find out later that I shouldn't have.
Sorry I'm being a pain in the rear with what are probably stupid questions.
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| Surrendering parental rights in Colorado |
| Child Custody & Visitation |
| We live in Colorado and my husbands ex wife moved out of state with his two kids. He pays child support, but doesn't have any contact with them. Every time he has tried his ex wife puts him down, and tells him he will never get to see his kids again. She now wants him to terminate his parental rights, she would then be the sole caregiver for them. He loves his kids very much, but she has made it impossible to see or talk to the kids and the courts tell him that she can do what ever she wants. Is he able to surrender his rights to her without someone willing to step in and become a step parent? I should say that he hasn't seen his kids in almost 4 years. Any advice would be great.
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| Early stage of abuse... what can I do? |
| Domestic Violence & Abuse |
So my and my boyfriend might be common law married now to start off. We have a 8 month old son and are currently living in his grandmothers basement. After I got pregnant he started becomming really controlling, not letting me go and see my friends, not letting me check my myspace. If I tried to leave the room when we were fighting, he would grab my arm, throw me on the bed and pin me down because he was afraid I was going to leave him. I couldn't have any friends that he didn't know and if I wanted to go see even my family, he had to go along. I started to realize how depressed I was getting from haveing no friends and realized something was wrong. He was doing the same thing my mothers ex started to do before he actually started hitting her. I have talked to some friends and family about this and they are all too eager to get me out. I have more that one place to stay if I need to, but I am not leaving without my son. I don't have a job and if I leave with my son I dont want him to get taken away from me because I didn't have a job when I left. What can I do? 
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| Grounds for changing Primary Custody |
| Child Custody & Visitation |
| My sister lives in Pottstown, PA. Her and her former husband are having custody issues with their 2 daughters, agest 10 and 7. Although my sister ANd her former husband both live OUT OF BUCKS COUNTY, for some reason his attorney and the Judge will not release it from that county. The former husband's attorney has filed numerous "contempt" charges against my sister for breaking the court ordered "visitination" schedule but dropped them. Now they filed yet another one, but are now asking for primary custody of the 2 girls. My sister does not have an attorney and does not qualify for legal aid even though she is collecting Social Security Disability and receives Section 8 housing. My question is, in what case can my sisters kids be taken away from her and primary custody turned over to the father? And, are there any attorney's out there that still do Pro Bono work for cases such as this. Only the children are suffereing. Thank you so much for your help.
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| modification of modified child support |
| Child Support |
If an ex-spouse has already modified child support (but hasn't paid it from the time it went into effect 20 months ago...) can he go back and have it modified again?
Can he 'be forgiven' of what he hasn't paid for the past 20 months by the court?
can he be entitled to tax deductions on years when he was not up to date on child support payments?
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| enforcement of child support order |
| Child Support |
Sorry. I started one of these earlier, but didn't know for sure how to do it--the 'thread' stuff is confusing for a non-computer geek!!
My ex-spouse owes me over 20 months in child support, which amounts to over $13,000 as of this August 1, 2009. In addition, he inverted some numbers in prior years, and shorted me roughly $600 a year from the year of the orginal divorce (2002) through 2007, when he filed for modification of support. That arrearage is roughly $3500, so there's a lot of backowed money involved with my situation.
We lived in Colorado at the time of the orginal divorce. When he medically retired from the FAA in Dec 2007, he moved to Florida, and filed for modification of support. This brought the support down from $1600 a month (6 minor kids in the original decree) to $795 a month for 5 kids (one reaches adulthood the end of Oct 2009). He then moved again, and since my adult child breeched his confidential message to her, I know he has moved to Oklahoma---a fact which may or may not be pertinent. But a fact that I'm not supposed to know, as my ex requested secrecy.
My ex also confided to my daughter that he intends to take me back to court as soon as he has paid a retainer fee to get his lawyer to file the forms with the court. I don't believe I've done anything illegal, so all I can do is speculate that my ex wants to have the already modified, unpaid support forgiven, and the mofication orders lowered even further. He believes he should be entitled to tax deductions on the majority of the children, even though he is in significant arrears on child support, including for the years he was paying an incorrect amount. So part of me feels he can't 'get anything' from taking me to court, except the pleasure of creating more anxiety and expense, and part of me sits like a deer in a headlight, not knowing what to expect or do.
My situation is obviously complicated, and I obviously need legal representation. However, with my limited finances, I can only hope there's a lawyer out there who might work with me (aka, represent me on a pay by the hour basis--or accept the majority of the retention fee after the actual court battle.) However, I don't know where to begin my search, and I'm fearing that time is imperative, since my ex claims he's going to take me back to court as soon as he can. Any suggestions?
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| Anthony Sharpley |
| Child Custody & Visitation |
I've been Divorced 2 1/2 years now, My Divorce Decree states that my former wife shall pay for 1/2 of the price it takes to replace lost passports for our two children. After waiting for her to complete this for some time, we attended Mediation regarding this issue. In Mediation she agreed to sign, notorize, and pay for 1/2 of the cost of the passports. Sticky part...the Mediation papers were never filed with the courts. Not knowing this, I filed contempt charges to try to resolve this. I lost for two reasons, first of all because the Divorce Decree only says she has to pay for half, not help obtain the passports. I can not get them without her consent. Also because her Lawyer did not file the Mediation papers with the court. There was no proof that we agreed to this. I did not have a Lawyer and did not realize he could just not file them or I would have done this myself. My question is what do I do next? I have split custody of our children 50/50. Can I ask the Judge to change that in my Divorce decree? What would I file? Also, prior to filing any motion or asking the courts to modify anything, do I have to go to Mediation again? I appreciate any advice you can give me.
Thank you,
TonyWhat is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
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| Need Help with contempt dismissal |
| Child Custody & Visitation |
My attorney withdrew from my case and the judge i don't think has signed off on it. I had a contempt case against the ex for lack of child support and health insurance.
I emailed my attorney and asked him if he can dismiss the case since i filed it (i was going to get rid of him after i did anyway). So i haven't heard from my attorney at all to know if 1.) the judge signed off on his withdraw and 2.) if he can file the dismissal of the case since child support enforcement is actively pursuing it since the attorney isn't (its been 2 years).
I was told to call the courts and ask about dismissing the case well, they can't even tell me if the judge signed off on it, let alone tell me what the status of anything is. So I'm in a bind and not sure where to get answers at.
So, how do i go about getting the case dismissed so that KCSE can go after him for it?
Like i said i am not getting any answers from my attorney or from the courts and i have a 2 hour trial on it in early august. I do know KCSE has already sent out a letter to intercept, but what i do not know. Their attorneys are for the state and not me and can't get any answers from them either.
I did find a form on the county court house it's with to dismiss but i'm not exactly sure what i need to do.
Would it be worth it if a local attorney could help file and all that with the dismissal, I'd pay at least for that. I do not rely on the child support and haven't since it was ordered 2 years ago, so jobless or not i am financially able to put out some money to get it done just do not have enough to pay a retainer at this time.
Please anyone
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| child support |
| Child Support |
| my brother lives in colorado and has recently lost his job. He has been paying child support and has a couple of children who are minors that have had children. Once they have children are they emancipated at that time or will he continue to pay support for them? The youngest one is 17 and has just graduated high school in June. Will he be obligated to continue to pay support until she is 18 (or 19) or once she leaves in August to go to college?
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| What should/could she do? |
| Child Custody & Visitation |
Im asking for a friend, and she could use some advice.
Her exhusband is from another country, and resides there also.
She separated from him when pregnant. He made threats and his name was omitted from birh certif. in Fl, so he could not obtain a passport. Baby was born years ago, she filed for the divorce, it was granted. She has sole parental custody, he is the legal father. No contact with minor child til he petitions the court, which he refuses to do, for years he denies he is the father, refuses to do dna but harasses my friend, and myself online via emails as he was given a physical address should he ever file papers to serve her for court. She doesnt know where he resides now in England.
He and his girlfriend, harasses her online, stalked her online and they had been emailing her old email account she left open, they CLAIM now they are taking her to court.
She has asked him to do the dna or leave her alone and move on with his life as she has as he has never shown any interest in their child and though he has seen photos, he denies he is the father though she looks so much like him, but to clear himself he should file.
He claims she has stopped him from seeing their child and denied him access to a child that could be his, as alledged. But divorce papers state NO CONTACT with minor child til HE completes parenting classes and petitions the court, he abuses having a phone number, and would constantly harass so he no longer has a home number, he has an address to send mail to.
HOW can she stop him from the harassment? She had asked him in the past to be involved and she came back with such nasty emails from them both saying he does not care about her child, has proof he cannot father children and other things they both so, but vehemently denying he is the father, but carries on harassing.
She plans on closing the email account down as they have a physical address, as I said, but he claims he is taking her to court soon, to prove she denied him access to their child, and he will seek custody, though he has not sent a post card or anything for over 5 years to the child and still rants about how he is not the father and does not care and will do anything to help authorities take away her rights to give him custody, in emails from him and his new wife..... though my friend has as I said sole parental reponsibility, has provided for her child, makes sure the childs needs are met before her own! He has done nothing but harass for years.
Couldn't she terminate his parental rights based on extreme parental disinterest? As I said, he still refuses to do the dna and will do the dna when they are ready not when she asks them to, and I guess feels he can walk into the court room and want to be father of the year. She has been waiting for him to take her to court for years now and he says for her to file. Court told her during the divorce hearing that HE had the DNA and is disputing it, its not up to you to file, it is up to him.
What can she do to get this resolved, its a weird situation and its bad enough he denies a child they created when married out of love, soon as she mentions divorce he changes his tune and is not the father and claims to have medical proof, but will not do DNA.
Any suggestions I can give to her? She cannot afford an AttorneyWhat is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
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| Mistake in Court Order/stipulation |
| Child Custody & Visitation |
Dad and I mediated our problems out, and signed a stipulation to submit to the judge to be signed. I am not sure if it has actually gone through yet, but apparently the final draft of the stipulation had a mistake on it. It states that dad gets every single Sunday. This is ironic because SM has been trying to convince me to give up my 1st and 3rd Sundays for a while (pretty much ever since dad started getting visitation). I was unaware of this mistake until I got an email from "dad" (SM, probably) stating that according to the CO I signed they have every single Sunday and they would be here today with the order in hand to pick up the children. I didn't get the email until after the pick up time. Apparently, they showed up to pick up the girls while we were still at church. I don't know if they filed a police report or not, as I wasn't home.
I KNOW what I signed and it did NOT say that they have the girls every single Sunday. They have tried to get me to consent to that for over a year now and I haven't because I know, from the first mediator we had, that I have a right to every other weekend with the kids under Califiornia standard visitation guidelines. I don't have a copy of what I signed yet because I told them I would pick it up after the judge signed it.
I don't know if the stip has been signed by a judge yet, and I want to know how I can have it corrected because I do NOT consent to giving up my kids every Sunday. Do I have any recourse? I'm going to call the courts tomorrow to see what is going on with it, but I don't know if I have to file anything, or what to do. I am seriously irritated.
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